Learning #12 - Unlocking the Power of Effective Communication: Overcoming the Limitations of Our Brain

When we listen to someone we are limited by our brain capability. We are only able to detect between 5 to 10% of information and the rest is automatically filled by our past experiences and view of the world. This is scary!

This means most of the time we really don't get the whole idea of what the other person is communicating but the worst is that we believe we do.

I have even met people who literally told me: I usually understand faster than others. And other colleagues, specially those that are seen as experts in their field that even interrupt you because they already "understood" what you were saying.

What to do about it?
  • Stop assuming you understand. It is not your fault, your brain is not helping you, instead your brain is tricking you to believe you do
  • Before you reply, repeat to the person what you think you heard and ask for validation: is this what you are saying?
When to apply it?
  • In theory always but then you will be slowing down the conversation, and it will become boring so I think its useful when the parties need to understand each other, when the stakes are high or the relationship matters, when the discussion is getting more aggressive and when someone believes they are not being listened to (which is probably true)

Thx for reading.

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